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Spending much money on hosting the Olympic Games is justified despite any circumstances

Английский форум Помощь Бесплатная подготовка к ОГЭ и ЕГЭ Эссе по английскому языку: ЕГЭ C2

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Модератор: karina_mia

Сообщение vladtheimpaler » 21.04.2014, 00:01

The Olympic Games are the oldest sporting contest in the world. There are two opposite opinions concerning hosting of the Olympic Games. Many people think that this is does not worth all money and efforts spent on hosting. While others think that there is no matter how much were spent?

In my opinion, this is the greatest honor for any country to host the Olympic Games because it has a lot of advantages. Firstly, The Games do not leave behind desolation and exhausting as many people think the Olympic Games leave a huge infrastructure which includes airports, roads, stadiums, undergrounds which improve cities’ life and attract many tourists because of modern architecture. Besides, The Olympic Games are a good opportunity to acquaint people from all over the world with national traditions of a hosting country it also gains its status on the world’s stage

On the other hand, millions of people are convinced that The Olympic Games are pretty unnecessary because such events make gaps in the countries’ budget that could not be filled for many years.

I totally disagree with this opinion, good planning can help to cover all wasted money by selling tickets, entertaining, and hosting fans in hotels.

In conclusion, I want to say that people should not be so greedy and selfish in deals like hosting the Olympic Games thinking only about country’s benefits because such events are too global to think about them local.
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Сообщение English Guru » 23.04.2014, 23:09

vladtheimpaler писал(а):this is does not worth
грубая грамматика: it is not worth - запомнить

vladtheimpaler писал(а):all money and efforts
пожелание: лучше использовать слово effort в единственном числе, по-английски это звучит естественноъ

vladtheimpaler писал(а):While others think that there is no matter how much were spent?
грубая грамматика: слово money - единственное число! money ..... was spent
странная формулировка, попытаюсь исправить: While others think that it does not matter how much money was spent.

vladtheimpaler писал(а):to host the Olympic Games because it has a lot of advantages.
they have a lot of - почему единственное число?

vladtheimpaler писал(а):Firstly, The Games do not leave behind desolation and exhausting as many people think the Olympic Games leave
Поставьте хоть какой-нибудь знак препинания на стыке as many people think the Olympic Games leave, например запятую или точку с запятой.

vladtheimpaler писал(а):traditions of a hosting country it also gains its status on the world’s stage
Поставьте хоть какой-нибудь знак препинания

vladtheimpaler писал(а):to cover all wasted money
грубая лексическая ошибка: waste - тратить попусту, это слово совершенно противоречит тому, что вы хотите сказать в сочинении.

vladtheimpaler писал(а):to think about them local.
Я понимаю, что слоган Apple - Think Different, но по правилам грамматики здесь необходимо наречие: locally.

- 1 балл за грамматику
- 1 балл за лексику
- 1 балл за пунктуацию

11/14
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Сообщение karina_mia » 01.06.2014, 18:06

Olympic Games essay
by Ildar


There is no doubt that hosting the Olympic games needs a great amount of money. That is why some people think we should not spend billion dollars on this international event . Others disagree; they believe the Olympics are supposed to bring different countries together and money problem is not so important.

In my opinion, wasting several billion dollars on such a short-term event is insane. Firstly, this money would be enough to feed the poor people, provide them with shelter and generally improve the level of our life. Secondly, stadiums that have been built in hosting countries are rarely used in future, and thus these buildings stay unoccupied for many years. Finally, the Olympics games may cause financial disaster, which is something no one wants to happen in their country.

On the other hand, some people claim that the Olympic games can easily bring a large boost to the economy of the hosting country, and the money that has been spent on the games will be paid back by tourism and tickets. In their mind, the country which hosted the games will attract more and more tourists in the future, and thus the popularity of the cities can also easily increase.

I cannot agree with these people. Even though the popularity of a hosting country may increase, we should not forget about people who have to put up with the noise and inconveniences when the stadiums are being built.

To sum up, I would say that there are far better things to spend money on besides sport, such as education, health or poverty. If we do not waste billion dollar on the Olympics, we have to think of ways how to make it more cheaper.
How people treat you is their karma.
How you react is yours.
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Сообщение English Guru » 01.06.2014, 18:16

karina_mia писал(а):we should not spend billion dollars
a billion dollars или billions of dollars

karina_mia писал(а):the Olympics games
the Olympic Games

karina_mia писал(а):If we do not waste billion dollar on the Olympics, we have to think of ways how to make it more cheaper.
Последнее предложение не особо понятно. Если мы не будет тратить попусту один миллиард долларов, мы должны думать о способах, как сделать это (его? кого его?) дешевле.

If we do not waste more than one billion dollars on the Olympics, we have to think of ways how to make them cheaper.

Две грамматические ошибки. Возможно, это предложение можно поставить в сослагательное наклонение...

-1 балл за грамматику

Итог: 13/14
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